recap of the producer's cut of the dinner party from hell

the producer's cut of the dinner party from hell began with a clever replacement of the ladies' usual quotes with the most profound offensive statements the ladies made during the dinner party from hell.  it was a nice touch.

we saw Camille, D.D. and Allison pregame with cocktails the size of Shana's mouth ... and then imbibe with the rest of the guests upon their arrival. between the pregame cocktails and the limo rides to the dinner party, it was painfully obvious both ladies (Kyle and Camille) had a hand in attempting to set the other up.  and both of them knew what the other was up to - it was uncanny how quickly the word "setup" rolled off their tongues - almost as if each of them had primed themselves with the word ahead of time).

Lisa got in an extra snarky comment to make the sidekick laugh out loud ("oops, it's been canceled" about the show Medium).

the ladies were faux-graciously received upon arrival, and they responded in insincere kind.  Kyle, Shana, and Lisa plotted to test the medium (hate to ruin the surprise - but she failed with flying colors).  Camille seated her sidekicks beside her and the rest of the ladies found seats beyond the buffer.

Allison asked Kim what she was drinking, to which Kim replied that she had had about 4 cokes.  Allison then declared that Kim was far too happy to have been drinking cokes (at no point did Kim actually look happy - okay with one fleeting exception).  Allison backpedaled and told Kim that she liked her.  Kim, perhaps in an attempt to see the best in Allison or perhaps because she was just so relieved that someone had finally decided to say something nice to her, smiled and told Allison she liked her too - her vibe and energy.  and then, it was searingly painful to watch Kim's happy expression (presumably because someone was finally being nice to her, or pretending to be) fade into a skeptical smile as Allison began spouting nonsense ... and then the smile eventually degraded into open-mouthed awe (i would have to watch it again, but i think this happened right about the time when Allison declared, "it's nice to be in control of your annihilation."  the sidekick is getting a vision that Allison was far too crazy to have only been drinking coke - but then, we already know she was taking her vodka by IV that night).  Allison then calmly and rationally explained, "i'm a secretary to the dead" (in response to what, i'm not certain).

Camille obviously pretended not to know who Faye was before psychically recalling seeing Faye naked on playboy after the OJ trial.  Camille uttered a backhanded compliment about enjoying Faye's spread.  Faye and Camille argued the subtleties of porn - apparently, there are fine distinctions that the classy porn models/porn stars are privy to that distinguish them from the trashy ones.

the electronic cigarette, of course, made its appearance .. and we heard Adrienne declare it obnoxious, but Camille defended Allison's decision.  apparently the classy thing to do is not to refrain from smoking (anything) at a dinner party - the appropriate behavior is, instead, to smoke something electronic so that you yourself only inhale vapor instead of smoke.  insert jedi mind trick here.  now it makes sense.

Faye, Shana, and Lisa begged for a reading for Lisa.  Allison had clearly done her homework on british stereotypes - she declared that Lisa was stingy with her emotions (they must have edited out the part in which Allison told Lisa that Lisa's dead great uncle told her that Lisa had bad teeth).  Allison could feel the presence of Lisa's grandmother who raised Lisa ... or the mother that Lisa had needed ... or the mother that Lisa visited occasionally ... or the mother that Lisa only communicated with via letters and had never met ... or ...

Allison reminded us that she was studied for years by quacks who are not acquainted with the scientific method, and these quacks declared her sane psychic.  the part in which she tells you to look her up on wikipedia must have gotten edited out - i'm sure she didn't neglect to mention her wikipedia article because it is chock full of reasons to think she is an opportunistic fraud who capitalizes on less advantaged grieving people.

real popularity of RHOBH

Okay, first, thanks to all for participating in the RHOBH popularity poll!

originally, i was hoping it might show that even if Kim wasn't most people's favorite, it didn't necessarily mean she was less popular than Kyle (as the polls on WWHL and reality tea seemed to suggest).  but what i think happened is that i put my poll up later and the public opinion tides had shifted.  so i didn't at all get the same results as the earlier polls (of course, it is possible that because i had so many fewer responses, my results aren't representative of the population in general - it is possible that people who favor Kim were more likely to come to my site than people who don't ... but i do kind of think maybe the change in RHOBH favorites might be real - these results seem consistent w/what i've been reading lately anyway).

so what are the results?

earlier, people were looking at the poll that asked people to vote for their favorite - and then inferring that the people who had the most votes were more popular than people with fewer votes (and of course, in a sense it is true - it just depends on how you define popularity.  but not having a lot of votes in that poll wouldn't necessarily mean that one is not popular, though - see previous post).  so i tried to replicate the poll here and show that someone might still be liked fairly well, even if not many people call them a favorite.  to some extent (especially with Camille), that seemed to happen.  in other cases, though, the people with the most favorite votes were also the people who were liked better than others, and vice versa.  after looking at the results, the order of popularity from the poll on this site was:

Kim, Adrienne, Lisa, Camille, Kyle, Shana

Kim has the most number of people thinking she is their favorite.  not only that, but when looking at how everyone (even people who don't consider her their favorite) ranked Kim relative to each of the other ladies, Kim was liked more than any other lady (yes, in some case(s), the term "lady" is used loosely).  Kim is liked by almost everyone, disliked by almost none.

Adrienne was slightly less popular than Kim (she had the second highest number of people calling her their favorite and she was liked better than each of the other ladies, aside from Kim).  almost everyone liked Adrienne and almost no one disliked her.

Lisa was third in the number of people who chose her as their favorite, and Lisa was liked better than Camille, Kyle, and Shana.  about half of the voters like Lisa, and less than a quarter of voters disliked her ... suggesting Lisa is generally (but not nearly universally) liked.  it also suggests she is a little bit polarizing - there were a sizable number of people choosing her as their favorite ... but also a sizable number of people who didn't like her.

RHOBH popularity

i've been enjoying the reality tea website, and there was recently some discussion about whether the polls on bravo and on that website were accurate with regard to who the most popular housewife was.  i started commenting on that site, but i thought it was worth a post explaining some of the issues with these polls.

on WWHL with Lisa, Andy asked everyone to vote for their favorite housewife.  Lisa got the most votes, followed by Kyle and Adrienne, then Kim, then Camille, and finally Taylor.  there were some people wondering how it could be that Kyle would be more popular than Kim - it seemed like maybe the results were off.  but reality tea also had a poll, and a similar result was found (and reality tea had a good number of people voting, so there is a good possibility to think the results are "real").  in the reality tea poll, Lisa got 47% of the vote, Kyle 24%, Adrienne 18%, Kim 6%, Camille 3%, and Taylor 2%.  so, if we assume that the polls were reasonably accurate, what does this actually mean?  does it mean that Lisa is most popular, that Kyle is more popular than Kim, that Taylor is least popular, etc.?

we would have to define what it means to be most popular.  if most popular only means that the most number of people like you best, then sure, that is a reasonable conclusion to take away from this poll.  but if most popular means that the most people view you most positively and not negatively, then no.  the poll does not at all tell us who is most popular.  below is an explanation of why and what is really going on.

asking who someone's first favorite housewife is doesn't tell us anything about who the second favorite housewife is.  what if 94% of the voters liked Kim second best, while 76% of the voters thought that Kyle was their least favorite housewife?  then who is more popular?  Kim, who is the favorite of only 6% of the people, but is second favorite for 94% of the voters?  or Kyle who is the favorite of 24% of the voters, but is the least favorite for 76% of the voters?

so ... what this shows us is that we cannot infer the order of popularity from polls like this.  how can we figure out an order of popularity?  the short answer is that it is not at all possible to have a completely fair voting system if there are more than 2 choices (see arrow's impossibility theorem, e.g., on wikipedia).  i'm tempted to demonstrate the problems (and what the real popularity standings are) by adding polls to the sidebar ... and sure, i guess i'll give it a whirl ... i'm not sure this blog has enough traffic to get a representative sample, but we can try it out.  if i get 100 votes at least, then i'll unpack what they mean for the popularity of the housewives.  if you would like to participate, what you'll have to do is vote in a bunch of different polls - but it should be quickish ;) sooo ... if you really, really want to know and don't mind doing several polls ... scroll down the sidebar and do some serious voting!  but i need you to vote in each one or else i won't be able to truly tell you what the polls say about popularity!

okay: one more issue.  i was not able to figure out how to make a poll that allows you to rank order which housewives you like.  so if you want to participate, could you just write a comment below in which you just write your order of housewives - put your favorite housewife first, second favorite second, third favorite third, etc.  you don't have to have a blogger account to post - you can even post anonymously or just make up a name below.  all righty ... here goes ...

Twitter @RHSidekick

paradigm shift

hate to say it ... really, really, really, really wanted to believe the best about as many of the ladies as possible ... but close inspection has prompted a bit of shifting in my paradigms.  more to come ... a fresh look at Kyle ... new compassion for Camille ... and the lie detector applied to Lisa ... as soon as i have enough time to type out my thoughts.

RHOBH soundtrack

i would kind of like to see ABBA as the soundtrack for the RHOBH ...(and maybe have the ladies perform their theme song ... that would be highly entertaining):

Camille - The Winner Takes It All
Kim - Under Attack
Shana - Money, Money, Money
Kyle - He is Your Brother
Lisa - Every Good Man
Adrienne - ? ? ?

Shana conspiracy

hmm ... fishy, fishy, fishy.  Shana finally apologized to Kim in her blog:

"Kim and I got off on the wrong foot from the beginning. I wish I could turn back time, reach out to her, and take the time to understand her better. I am sorry for arguing with her and for allowing myself to get so frustrated that I said things I didn’t mean. "


interesting.  maybe she's been tapping into the reactions of the cowards ... given that her attempts to emotionally manipulate them did not work (i.e., trying to bully people out of a behavior (blogging about her in an unfavorable way) by calling anyone who blogs about her in an unfavorable way a coward ... your bullying has no power in the blogosphere, Shana).


nonetheless, the sidekick is still not satisfied.  Shana has never fully acknowledged what she actually did.  the sidekick was hoping that on watch what happens live, Lisa would have revealed a bit more (because, let's be honest, Lisa must know).  so it makes me wonder ... perhaps there was a conversation on the plane that Lisa doesn't want to get out either.  during the NY fight episode, Camille asked about how the plane ride was, Lisa said it was fine and she had sat with Shana ... seemed painfully obvious that Shana stirred up the trouble by repeating her and Lisa's conversation - could it be that Lisa had probed for information about Camille from Shana?  could it also be that Shana had already chatted with Camille and Lisa, therefore, had elicited some information?  if so, poor Kim just got caught in the crossfire.  Shana was the one talking about Camille's feelings of insignificance in the airport .. Kim asked a clarifying question ... and suddenly Kim became the sacrificial lamb.  Kim tried to stand up for Kyle by speaking up to say it was Shana who had suggested Camille was insecure ... but Kyle just wasn't listening to her.  and Kim suffered for telling the truth and for trying to have her sister's back.  Kim was betrayed for the sake of people who had caused the trouble in the first place.

Cedric's tells

because Lisa is too classy to fight this battle (or because Lisa may or may not have something to hide by not fighting it), i'm going to tell a few of my secrets.

shhh ... i'm not really psychic ... i'm just aware of the tactics that "psychics" use - kind of like the ones Allison DuBois uses to trick people, except that she really sucks at them.  oh, and except that i'm forever in student loan debt because i choose not to exploit grieving parties with tall tales of communicating with their deceased loved ones.  but let's try to keep my secrets hush, hush, shall we?  would hate for everyone to know the real housewives sidekick is just a sidekick and not a psychic.

okay, so let's take a look at Cedric's interview.  some of what he says may be true.  some of it is rehearsed, and potentially a lie.  and some of it is most likely a spontaneous lie.

the spiel in which Cedric declares he lived with Ken and Lisa for 6 months and was asked to move back in with them because Lisa lied to Bravo and said he still lived with them was rehearsed.  Cedric was more highly aroused at this point than during other instances of being on camera.  his mouth was dry (hence the frequent licking of his lips - e.g., right before he said that Lisa lied and said he lived with them).  he nervously touches his ear/pushes his hair back (e.g., right before he said that 2 years ago he lived with them for 6 months).  his body is in constant swaying motion.  he is blinking his eyes excessively and having trouble maintaining eye contact with the interviewer.  and, quite notably, at breaks in the rehearsed lines, his eyes gaze (up and) to the left - suggesting he is creating a story.  the above clip even begins with a major upward left glance while Cedric brushed his hair aside.  also, they look again to the left when Cedric reasserts he moved out after 6 months (at about 15 seconds into the clip).

reunion, part 2

all the respect in the world to Kyle and Kim for choosing to keep very personal issues private.  best wishes to them for deep healing and reconciliation.

in general news, Kim revealed that she did not remember Kyle saying what Camille had accused her of saying (and let's be honest, Kim's memory has been impressive in the footage that was shown).  the only trouble: Kyle was shaking her head (in the no-ward direction) while Kim was speaking.  sidekick powers are suggesting Kyle was shaking her head because of a "too little too late" sentiment ... but could be taken to mean Kim was not telling the truth.  sidekick powers suggest if Kim were being untruthful, though, Kyle or Camille might have stepped in.  the behavior was a bit puzzling.

Adrienne made so many sweet, subtle, supportive gestures toward Kim - heartwarming.  love Adrienne.  all the appreciation in the world for Adrienne for the way that she calmly and kindly sticks up for others.  though even Adrienne couldn't hide the awkwardness of the suggestion of setting Kim up with one of her brothers.  is the sidekick the only one who doesn't think Kim's problems will be solved by another man?  she needs love, trust, and companionship ... but also needs to feel like she has a good enough handle on her sense of self before plunging into a romantic relationship. at least she seems to have reconsidered having the other housewives set her up (and i do mean set her up).

best of Lisa

- her voicemail message that tricks callers into thinking she can't hear them
- her interview describing her reaction to meeting the big, strong, texan cowboy Russell for the first time
- telling Kyle that the hypnotist was a salesman
- surprising Cedric in the Turkish bath
- her depiction of Taylor's cotton candy eating as something she had only read about in books
- driving away from Cedric in the parking lot
- "Camille had two of her friends there.  one was her best friend, and one was her sidekick ... i mean psychic."

new thoughts on Kyle vs. Camille

how foolish of me to fall for the false dichotomy - that either Kyle or Camille was completely correct about what was said in vegas.  though i still lean more toward believing that the entire problem was a result of an overly sensitive Camille misinterpreting something Kyle said (that really wasn't laced with any kind of negative meaning), what was actually said might have been grayer than i originally thought.  upon re-watching the entire argument in ny, it appeared that Kim may have been hesitant to speak because she was afraid what she had to say would have angered both parties - what if Kim worried that her version was not exactly what either person wanted to hear?

in her interview about the argument, Kim said, "i think if i had opened my mouth, there's no telling which person would take it the right or wrong way.  i never heard my sister say, 'why would anyone be interested in you without Kelsey?'"

so the million dollar question is, Kim, what did you hear?  and Andy, why didn't you ask Kim what she heard?  Kim later tells Kyle, "but you did say, 'so he's not going,' and she misinterpreted it."  but the sidekick wants to know exactly what Kim heard of the whole conversation.


other interesting things i either forgot or didn't pay much attention to the first time i watched the ny fight episode:

it is painfully obvious that Taylor was spreading malicious gossip about the other women to Camille.  Camille was very passive aggressively asking other women what they said about her: "so nobody in this room ever said anything about me being insecure?" "how was the plane ride?" etc.

(in fairness to Camille, yes, it must be incredibly upsetting to think that a group of people are all talking about you behind your back ... especially if someone has led you to believe that the group was attacking you in your absence ... but from the footage that was actually aired, it did not seem like they were trying to attack her ... it seemed like they were trying to understand the situation and reach a plan for its resolution ... it's not Camille's fault that she did not know that - all Camille knew was Taylor's (highly motivated and opportunistic?) version of what had happened.  the version in which only Taylor stayed out of the conversation, no doubt.  but even if you feel hurt or threatened, there are still ways of resolving conflict that don't involve passive aggression (which, incidentally, doesn't resolve anything)).

so .... anyway ... we find out Lisa and Taylor were talking about Camille on the plane (Camille asks how the plane ride was?  Lisa answers it was fine and that she sat with Taylor - Lisa is a smart cookie - she knows exactly what is going on here).  but is this plane conversation yet another reason Taylor wanted to have a secret, private conversation with Camille?  what else did Taylor need to cover up?

Kim freely volunteered she had made a comment about insecurity because Taylor had said Camille felt insignificant.  and then you could see Taylor's eyes suddenly turn red as her inner demon surfaced and she started threatening Kim to leave her out of everything.  wait a minute, Taylor, weren't you the one who was telling everyone how you thought Camille felt?  and weren't you the one who went out of your way to explain that it was only your opinion that Camille felt insignificant?  there's no reason to think Kim had said anything about Camille's insecurities until Taylor brought them up.  and it sure didn't look like Kyle had said anything about them either until that same point - because at that point, Kyle appeared to be feeling a bit of relief as though the whole situation made sense in light of Taylor's opinion.  is it possible that on the plane, Lisa had expressed to Taylor that she thought Camille had some insecurities.  sure, it's possible.  but Lisa seems like one who chooses words carefully to suit the company she keeps.  sidekick powers are telling me she wouldn't have let her guard down unscrupulously with Taylor.  it sounded more like maybe Lisa just recounted what happened, without much commentary.  Taylor seemed happy to tell the others she had deduced Camille's insecurity all on her own.  but then she told Camille that Lisa had prompted her (Taylor) to say that Camille was insecure on the plane.

everyone was confused.  and they were confused legitimately.  why?  because no one was prompting Taylor to say Camille was insecure.  but that is what Taylor told Camille.  in everyone else's experience, Taylor had been freely commenting that it was her own personal opinion that Camille felt insignificant.

also, Kim got another little quip in that i missed the first go round.  when Taylor is trying to save face and trying not to be held accountable for the fact that she did say she thought Camille felt insignificant, Taylor asserted that she had no knowledge of the fight between Kyle and Camille.  to which Kim replied, "careful Taylor."  Kim, tell us what you know!  so after Kim warned Taylor to be careful (thus insinuating that Kim knew Taylor was lying about something - presumably, lying about not knowing what happened between Kyle and Camille), all of a sudden Taylor threatened to pull some Oklahoma on Kim's ass.  wow, Kim, you struck a major nerve.  apparently, Taylor doesn't like it when people call her on her lies.  but Kim, for the love of reality television in all its gory, don't give Taylor warnings!  just blurt out what you know!  will someone please pay this woman for a reveal-all?  for now, the sidekick will work with the theory that Taylor had already talked to Camille about the fight in NY and Taylor had told Kim about this (perhaps right before Kim says in the airport, "well, i was there ..."). perhaps Camille told Taylor she felt invisible ... and perhaps Camille thought Kyle told her not to be insecure because Taylor broke a confidence.  so Taylor had to cover her butt ... and did so by claiming that others kept prodding her for information (and probably insisting she didn't say anything).  how does Taylor keep all her lies straight?

the b word

*i accidentally pasted the link to this post on a comment at reality tea.  i'm sorry about that - i actually meant to post the link to the video in that comment.  so if that is what you are trying to find, it is actually here:
http://www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-beverly-hills/season-1/videos/marriage-problems
sorry about that!*



bullying is an all too real problem.  but calling someone a bully for simply defending him/herself (particularly when you are knowingly spouting lies about them) is inappropriate and dismisses the experience of people who are actually being bullied.  way to go, Camille.  Kyle was calling you on the fact that your story has, verifiably, changed so often that all of the stories couldn't possibly be true.  given your offense, she was even challenging you relatively calmly.  but rather than stick to an issue, you struck below the belt again and dropped the b-word. sidekick is getting a vision ... yes, Kyle was right ... someone did advise you to drop the word ... it was ... it was ... someone you pay ...

but now that you have dropped the b-word, let's think about which cast member actually behaved like one during the reunion.  and the winner of the bully award goes to ........... Taylor! for her disgusting role in tormenting Kim.  congratulations, Taylor, you should really be proud.

during the reunion, Lisa brought up Taylor instigating trouble in NYC.  to be fair, Camille is just as much at fault as Taylor was - after all, Camille was only pretending to have made up (a catty thing to do, Camille).  so the blame falls on both of them - Camille used a cowardly way of dealing with her anger (and, do we need to point out again, her anger was misdirected - it is fine that she felt extra sensitive because she had good reasons to feel that way - but she needs to point her finger Kelsey's and others' way, not Kyle's) and Taylor selfishly used the opportunity to promote herself while stepping on others (by gossiping with Camille and pretending to be on Camille's "side" - silly Camille, Taylor is only on her own side).  and for some reason(s), Taylor just didn't like Kim, so Kim bore the brunt of it.

in defense of Kim

Kim comes across as so tragically vulnerable that it is easy to overlook the fact that what she is saying in the midst of conflict is really quite true and accurate.  Kim is obviously flustered in the midst of conflict, and perhaps she lacks the desire and/or confidence to really hammer away at her adversaries, even when what she is saying is true ... so her contributions to understanding what went on during the conflicts have been grossly neglected.

so what happened in vegas?  and how did the fight with Taylor Armstrong fit in?  the sidekick must do a little detective work ... there are definitely some spaces to fill in because either Kim did not fill in all the blanks, or the more extended edition was edited out.

first, let's start with the initial fight between Kyle and Camille.  Kim was present, and Kim knew that Kyle did not ask Camille why anyone would be interested in her without her "big shot" husband. (*this was what i originally wrote and i'm not deleting it because that is cheating ... but see newer entries for revisions)

next, let's explore what happened at the airport.  Kim, Taylor, Kyle, & Kim were walking through the airport.
Kim: so where's Camille?
Taylor: she's in new york already.
Kyle: what do you mean she's in new york already?
Kim: it's not because of the situation with Kyle -
Kyle: i'm confused ... it's not because of me, come on.
Kim: it's because of you.
Lisa: you're being ridiculous.  i think she went to spend time with Kelsey.
Taylor: yes she's missing her hubby.
while Kim said: no, she didn't want to fly with -
Lisa: these bloody shoes are killing me.
Kyle: here we are, 37b.

RHOBH Reunion anticipation

with part 1 of the reunion of the real housewives of beverly hills rapidly approaching, one can't help but wonder what excitement is in store for us tonight?

the preview promises to delve into:
name calling and adjective hurling and you can just guess which words belong to which housewives: conniving, passive aggressive, narcissistic, bully, egotistical, vindictive, vile, liar, violent, delusional (see earlier post below)
Kelsey Grammer's inability to keep his snake in his trousers
Adrienne Maloof's marriage
Camille's allegations that the season was set up to vilify her
exchanges of threats between Kim Richards and Taylor Armstrong
questions of whether Taylor is a hypocrite for threatening violence while speaking out against it
Cedric's tantrum toward Lisa VanderPump
whether Kim has a drinking problem
Camille's life in the adult film industry (with a dash of pot calling the kettle black with regard to Camille's derogation of Faye Resnick)

for a season cast with so many strong, potentially kind, potentially supportive women, who could have potentially learned so much from each other, something went terribly wrong ... and sidekick powers tell me some issues only get wronger and wronger as the reunion plays itself out ...